What scene more idyllic than an Oxfordshire riverbank? The gentle lapping of water, the chirruping of birds, the whispering of the warm spring zephyr amidst verdant leaves.
O pastoral charm indeed!
And onto this peaceful scene wander an elderly couple, their sweet voices blending serenely with the rural soundscape:
She: 'You won' even listen to me!'He: 'I'm listnin' to you. I'm listnin'.'She: 'You ain't been listnin'. You don't never listen. It's what I'm talkin' about.[Pause]... You just wish I would go away, don't you?'He: 'I never said that. I never said that. Look, I'm listnin' to you aren't I?'She: [With great vehemence] 'You don't ever listen![At this point, an echoingly gigantic fart is released. The creatures of the riverbank fall silent.][continuing, unfazed] ... You just think about yourself. You just wish I'd go away. You ain't been listnin'!'